The issue of comprehensive, competent and healthy development of the child has long been a key issue in the ranking of topical topics.
To give the best to your child means to love the baby, to understand what stages of development he goes through, what his main needs are and how parental behavior can influence the formation of his physical, emotional and psychological potential.
Until the age of 5, a child develops important skills and abilities, as well as building a life scenario, making important early decisions on the basis of which a person will act and interact with the world in later adult life.
From birth to age five, a child goes through four stages of development:
- 0 to 6 months – the stage of existence;
- 6 months to 1.5 years – action stage;
- 1.5 years to 3 years – the stage of thinking;
- from 3 to 5-6 years – the stage of identity and strength.
Let’s take a closer look at each of the stages of child development and define the main tasks for the healthy and full development of the baby.
EXISTENCE STAGE (0 TO 6 MONTHS)
The mood and self-awareness with which the child will come into the world, of course, depends on how the intrauterine development of the fetus went, how the mother felt, whether he had to endure any emotional shocks with his mother.
It is extremely important that in the womb the child does not feel a lack of oxygen, and receives enough useful substances, vitamins, and Omega-3 fatty acids. Their value is extremely high, since fatty acids are necessary for the construction of brain cells.
I propose to take it as a truth that the child in the womb felt comfortable and cozy, received warmth, care and felt the love of his parents and their anxious expectation of his birth.
A child comes into this world absolutely helpless and defenseless, both on the physical level and on the psychological level. And he will have to study how this world works, learn its rules and learn how to interact with himself and others. In all these processes, the leading role is played by parental support, stability and the ability to satisfy the leading needs of the child, to teach him to cope on his own, to be a healthy example for the baby.
The stage of existence is the period when the tiny man makes one of his most important decisions: the decision to LIVE.
From 0 to 6 months, the baby is completely dependent ( in a good sense of the word ) and is in a healthy symbiosis with his mother. This means that he absorbs and accepts all the shades and facets of the world, all its messages, both positive and negative, through the state of the mother. It is from her psychological, emotional and physical condition that the condition of the baby depends.
Therefore, it is extremely important that the mother feels comfortable, has the opportunity to relax and satisfy her needs for support, care, and safety.
Typical behavior of the crumbs during this period:
- makes various sounds from “purr” to a piercing cry, in order to learn about his needs;
- gives out the first smile and the first affectionate touches of himself and other family members – learns affection and love;
- carefully looks and reacts to faces, especially to the eyes – this is how he studies the emotional sphere, learns to distinguish and recognize moods;
- imitates.
During the existence stage, the child learns:
- call for help when he needs something;
- shouting or otherwise signaling needs;
- receive physical contact; take care;
- form an emotional connection, learn to trust caring adults and yourself.
The main task of parents during this period is to provide a healthy environment. This means being reliable and trustworthy, responsive to the needs of the child, and of course, not being afraid to seek help, support, find options for getting new, competent information from specialists if you are not sure or feel a lack of knowledge about how to take care of a child. and/or about yourself.
Categorically, it is impossible not to respond to the call of the child, not to touch and hold enough time in your arms, to react harshly, angrily, excitedly, to ignore or punish the child.
The healthy and harmonious passage of this stage by the child serves as the basis for important decisions: to live, prosper, trust people, enjoy and expect that his needs will be met.
The time when the child decides that it is possible to trust others, that it is safe and interesting to explore the world, that it is possible to trust their feelings, to be aware of their knowledge, to be creative and active, and to receive support while doing it all.
If at this stage the child does not receive support from parents and does not see the opportunity to satisfy his leading needs, his early decisions may range from ” I will crush or interfere ” to ” I will wait for the other to do for me or do nothing ” .
Typical behavior of the crumbs during this period:
- shows curiosity, while quickly distracted,
- wants independence
- calls for help from a parent (or nanny) when he needs it,
- starts to play “coo-coo”
- can start using words in the middle and end of a stage.
During the action stage, the child learns:
- Explore and experience the world around you
- develop sensory perception, using all the senses,
- signal needs; trust others and yourself
- get help in difficult times
- understand that there is a choice, and that not all problems are easily solved,
- develop initiative.
Many parents expect their child to start going to the potty quickly, but this skill comes a little later, closer to three to three and a half years.
The main task of parents during this period is to continue to create an atmosphere of love and a safe environment for the baby, to protect him from harm, to encourage and support the child, to exchange caring touches.
To satisfy the need for research and solve its main tasks at this stage of development, the baby uses all the senses. Therefore, the right parental decision is not to shield the child from the world and not interfere with his exploratory instinct, but to make the world around the child safe, support and satisfy his needs.
It is categorically impossible to criticize and shame the child, shout loudly or severely punish him for faults or inability to do something, or resort to ignoring the baby.
A healthy and harmonious passage by the child of the stage of action serves as the basis for important decisions: to do, create, create.
STAGE OF THINKING (FROM 1.5 TO 3 YEARS)
A child of this age category begins to develop causal thinking; he learns to play “near” other children, but not yet with them.
A two-year-old child can be given simple and clear instructions that he can follow, as well as teaching him to cope with his negative emotions.
If a child at this age feels pressure and negative attitude from adults, or parents do not consider it necessary to encourage and develop cause-and-effect thinking and the ability to think for themselves in him, he may decide that it will not be better to get out and lie thinking, expecting someone else to make a decision for him, is the best thing for him.
Typical behavior of the crumbs during this period:
- begins to be neat, sometimes even intrusive,
- sometimes follows simple commands, sometimes resists,
- may try to arrange outbursts of anger (tantrums).
- Sometimes a baby can behave defiantly: “No, I won’t, and you won’t force me” – this is how his first separation from his parents occurs and the need for independence is manifested.
At the thinking stage, the child learns:
- develop the ability to think independently,
- test reality by facing the limitations and opposition of other people,
- learn cause-and-effect thinking and problem solving based on it,
- express anger and other feelings
- Separate from parents without losing their love.
The main task of parents during this period is to develop in the child the ability to think, teach him to move from one activity to another, help the child cope with his feelings, support and praise for achievements, rejoice and give him a lot of time.
Another correct decision on the part of parents will be to gradually introduce into the life of the child adequate rules that help establish reasonable boundaries of behavior, and monitor their implementation.
It is categorically impossible to treat a child as a “terrible two-year-old”, criticize, devalue his achievements or severely punish him for wrongdoing.
A healthy and harmonious passage by a child of the stage of thinking serves as the basis for important decisions : to think, reflect, take responsibility for oneself.
STAGE OF IDENTITY AND POWER (FROM 3 TO 5-6 YEARS)
The period of “why” and little thinkers. It is at this time that the child begins to form his own “I”. He separates from his mother and becomes a separate, according to his personal perception, figure.
During this period, the first questions appear: “Who am I?”, “Where am I from?”, “Who is around me?”.
Often, at the age of three, children go to kindergarten, where they begin to actively explore the nuances and differences between the world of boys and the world of girls.
The psychological load increases. A small person finds himself in new conditions that force his nervous system to adapt to a new stereotype of behavior. You can strengthen the child’s nervous system with the help of hardening, outdoor activities, good sleep, as well as a complete balanced diet (proteins, fats and carbohydrates).
For the nervous system, fats are of particular importance. But not only the amount of fats in the child’s diet is important, but also their quality – Omega-3 polyunsaturated fatty acids will help protect the child’s nervous system from overload.
Typical behavior of the crumbs during this period:
- arranges games – fantasies, possibly with imaginary partners;
- collects information: how, why, when, for how long, etc.;
- tries different roles in role-playing games;
- begins to learn power relations by observing and arranging power struggles;
- takes action to define gender-related roles;
- starts joint games;
- learns acceptable behavior in society;
- Becomes interested in games by the rules.
At the stage of identity and strength, the child learns:
- assert yourself as a separate person;
- collect information about the world, about yourself, about your body, about the role associated with sex;
- understand that behavior has consequences;
- explore your influence on others and your place in the group;
- show strength within the framework of socially acceptable behavior;
- separate fantasy from reality;
- to understand over what he has power and over what he does not have.
The main task of parents during this period: parents should understand that, on the one hand, a child at this age is actively striving for independence, but at the same time, he really needs care, love and support, at the psychological, emotional and physical levels.
This is his first step towards himself and parental permissions are important for him by type: we believe in you, you can, I know you can handle it, I will support you.
It is important to encourage children to explore the world of things, people, ideas and feelings. Encourage the child to be happy that he is a boy or a girl, to teach that both sexes are good. Expect the child to express feelings and train him to think and feel at the same time.
It is strictly forbidden to tease a child by making fun of his role-playing games or fantasies, to use fantasies to frighten or embarrass the child; be inconsistent in their decisions; do not expect children to think for themselves, nor are they willing to answer questions.
It is unacceptable to criticize cruelly and enter into disputes about who is right and who is wrong, to compare who or what is better or worse, to ignore the child and his needs.
The above negative manifestations on the part of parents can lead to the fact that the child will take one of the early decisions with a minus sign, accept as true that it is better for him to compete, suppress, manipulate or completely obey, and show complete impotence.
A healthy and harmonious passage by the child of the stage of identity and strength will become the basis of important decisions: to cooperate and interact with oneself and others, to make decisions and bear responsibility .
Parents, remember that for your children you are a legislative body, your messages and attitudes, until some time, or even all your life, a person perceives it as a dogma.
The best choice, on your part, is to decide to give your child information about the world, correct false information, and find healthy ways to answer his questions.
